The full quote there is \u201cI think if I had had a bottle at that moment I would have put one of the cards into it, playing shipwrecked sailor, just to do something amusing to tell my friends about in Cartagena.\u201d Thinking about stuff that\u2019d be fun to do and doing things for the sake of amusing friends\u2014that\u2019s me, right there. The first post on this blog said \u201cI\u2019m a writer, I write<\/a>,\u201d and well. Hell. You can probably stop here. <\/p> As I get older, or maybe because I\u2019m a dad now and have to look at calendars more, I\u2019m becoming more invested in yearly traditions and reflections. Trying to take stock, reflect, not let things get lost to time. This blog bills itself as an elegy, after all. <\/p> It\u2019s also, well\u2014November 2022 was a time of uncertainty for me. My contract with Cracked.com<\/em> wasn\u2019t getting renewed, Mal and I had just bought a house, I was starting out on staff at Cotton Xenomorph<\/em>, my kid was starting all-day school and for the first time, which meant I could more or less have a workday dedicated to writing. I\u2019m happy to say I feel like things have worked out okay. <\/p> Why \u2018shipwrecked sailor?\u2019<\/strong><\/p> The short, easy answer is: I like Gabriel Garc\u00eda M\u00e1rquez, and I like the sea. <\/p> The longer answer, not to spoil Friday\u2019s column, is that there\u2019s something about that book that feels elemental to me. The eponymous shipwrecked sailor, Luis Alejandro Velasco, is a Navy man crewing a destroyer sailing from Mobile, AL, home to Cartagena, Colombia. One night, a storm strikes, Luis is thrown overboard, and heroically survives 10 days floating on a life raft. Upon his return home, he is hailed as a hero, given large sums of money to endorse products like the watch or shoes he was wearing while floating in the Caribbean, \u201ckissed by beauty queens,\u201d and generally treated to the exalted life. Yet he still wishes to tell his story<\/em> to Gabo and the opposition-to-the-dictatorship newspaper that employs him. <\/p> Why? <\/p> Because there was no storm, Luis Alejandro Velasco and his crewmates (all of whom drowned) were thrown from the destroyer because it wasn\u2019t weighted properly. It wasn\u2019t weighted properly because it was transporting contraband cargo, which was against the rules for destroyers to ship, and the dictatorial regime had an interest in lying the circumstances that resulted in unnecessary death and suffering. The blowback was fierce. The newspaper shut down, Luis Alejandro Velasco had to \u201cdisappear into everyday life,\u201d and Gabo began what he refers in the introduction to as his \u201cexile\u201d in Europe. <\/p> Even though fascism is ascendant in my country, I\u2019m not going to pretend I\u2019m some sort of hard-nosed journalistic truth-teller or some abused-within-an-inch-of-his-life worker. I do<\/em> have a low tolerance level for bullshit and the play-nice you have to do with a lot of polite society, and I have<\/em> been a put-upon worker, but I\u2019m not comparing myself to Luis Alejandro Velasco or Gabriel Garc\u00eda M\u00e1rquez. <\/p> Feels right to nod to them, anyway. You write, you tell stories you want to tell even when everything around you is shit, I mean come on, you\u2019re still alive, after all. <\/p> If I were to make an all-influence Starting Five, like we\u2019ve started asking guests to do on The Line Break<\/em>, that book would be the beating heart of the lineup, like Joakim Noah on the 2009-2015 Bulls. <\/p> It Started With Music<\/strong><\/p> It was around 2015 when I realized I can\u2019t stop writing songs. I pick up my guitar, I noodle around, certain things stick, and eventually I get mad that they aren\u2019t recorded songs, because I can hear what they would<\/em> sound like with bass and drums and keys and such, but everyone else just hears the coily jangles on an unplugged Fender Jazzmaster. I took some songs that had nowhere else to go, released i dreamed a knife like a song you can\u2019t whistle<\/a> <\/em>in 2016, then had enough fun and felt accomplished enough to do if not a river<\/a><\/em> in 2017. \u201cFelt accomplished\u201d here doesn\u2019t mean I think I\u2019m some expert producer, but I remain proud of that work. Better than no songs. <\/p> My dear friends Pat<\/a> and Eddie<\/a> badgered the rest of our group chat into making music during Covid lockdowns, which resulted in J<\/a> <\/em>in 2020, followed shortly by Brendan and my first collab, weight of an anchor<\/a><\/em>, also in 2020. There is at least one more record coming in 2024, and more after that one. Again\u2014having fun, trying to do cool shit with my friends. <\/p>![\"File:Giant](\"https:\/\/substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com\/public\/images\/287e9db7-5551-4ef1-960e-c9936d306455_612x586.jpeg\")
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