For the record, I’m not actually sure this is a problem<\/em>, because it all comes together in the end. I do eventually think about meaning and content, and think about it a lot. Excessively, as anyone who reads this blog might say. <\/p>\n\n\n\n What I’ve Been Reading This Week:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n A book that is told in mostly short vignettes. A book with a new formulation\/genre exercise\/trope to explore in each chapter title. A book that, content warning, is an exploration of gaslighting and domestic abuse in the context of a lesbian relationship. A book that I couldn’t put down. I’m talking, of course, about In The Dream House<\/em> by Carmen Maria Machado. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Style first\u2014the main benefit of using short chapters with different genre edicts (“Dream House as Stoner Comedy,” “Dream House as I Love Lucy,” etc). The effect of this is sort of like a massive buffet line, but if you put every item on your plate, it actually does add up to a full meal, with each item complementing the other. Machado can weave together the abusive-relationship-as-haunted-house metaphor, some sourced research on abuse in queer relationships and its relative lack of coverage, and the actual narrative of events pretty seamlessly. It’s also an effective way illustrate the tension as things in the relationship worsen. The white space when the chapter ends says a lot. What happens in the next chapter fills in some gaps. Even though I just read a memoir, I still don’t want to speak to others’ experience. Still, I’ll say that it does felt like the realization that the relationship was abusive was a slow one, pieced together over time, until the other woman’s actions became absolutely undeniable. That’s when, in the text, we start to see some follow-up from chapter to chapter: “have you signed up for therapy yet” and “aren’t you concerned that you have no memory of this incident” are two lifelines Carmen throws out, to a person who says that their hands are too full for lines, and they’d rather drown, thanks. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Content: I don’t know how sordid you, reader, want me to be here. There isn’t a ton of physical violence (definitely some, though, including some arm-grabbing that has not left my mind), but I spent a good portion of the book unsettled. The abuse is mostly emotional, mostly about control, and I almost believe the abuser talking about having no memory. There’s a lot of unable-to-handle-a-few-drinks. There’s also some establishing of the fact that she’ll lie to get what she wants. Lying comes easily to her. The controlling nature of the abuse is particularly skin-crawling. <\/p>\n\n\n\n On The Line Break<\/em>, we’d call this paragraph “what’s going on beyond the page.” Will any of this come out right? Who knows. Here goes: I don’t read a lot of memoir, my interest in chisme is next to nada, I’m never gonna the guy who wants tea. Knowing that this was a true story, though, and knowing that the unnamed abuser is also a writer2<\/a><\/sup>? I felt a confusing mix of things. I wanted to avoid her writing, I wanted to not risk it coming across my desk. Then, I wondered if that was fair\u2014should someone’s entire life be defined by the choices they made in their mid-20s, which were then written about by someone else? Who gets to define or tell someone else’s story? Ultimately, I don’t think there’s anything wrong<\/em> or whatever with Machado writing this excellent book. If there is any attempt at saying sorry, coming to terms with bad behavior, anything like that? It’s not on the page. So let me not offer absolution (which isn’t mine to give in the first place) to someone who, for all I know, has asked for none. Here’s another confession: I gave into what I called “perverse, base” instincts (my wife called them “human, understandable”) and Googled3<\/a><\/sup> who the abuser was. I will not reveal who it is here.4<\/a><\/sup> I can’t say that knowing enhanced the book or my life in any way. The knowledge at the end of that particular bit of research is seeing the face of a person who did some awful things, but still gets to walk around in the world. That’s not news to me. But Carmen’s story, her writing? Not only is this book great, it’s important. The world is a better place with Carmen Maria Machado thriving and writing in it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n LINKS!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Something to listen to while you browse? I’ve really been enjoyed Happy Imaeda’s drumming videos on YouTube. Guy is a really interesting drummer, and the vibes are immaculate. <\/p>\n\n\n\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/www.lazyandentitled.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/09\/IMG_6478-768x1024.jpg\")